Elderly male patient: So's every spring I get this thing where my nose runs and my sinuses get all full-up and I start the cough and it just gets somethin' awful.
Cranquis: Oh, that sounds like --
Patient *interrupting*: And my eyes get all watery ta make me scratch my eyeballs out!
Cranquis: I see. Well that sounds like --
Patient: *interrupting*: It's malaria.
Cranquis: -- seasonal allergies. Wait. What?
Patient: Yep. Malaria, I tell ya. I had it in the Pacific during the War, and it comes back every spring to haunt me in my sinuses.
Cranquis: Aaand... what does your family doctor usually do to cure the... malaria?
Patient: He gives me these eye-drops and these "low-rate-a-deen" pills and it knocks the malaria right out!
Cranquis: Terrific! That's just what ~I~ was gonna recommend!
This is excellent. Oh Loratadine thank you for doing wonders for allergies...